I’m in Tenby in South West Wales for the weekend. ‘m doing a bit of work tomorrow in Carmarthen and so i thought I’d take advantage of being over here and have a couple of nights by the sea. I love Tenby. My parents honeymooned here and we had at least one holiday here when I was little – happy days.
It’s the first time I’ve been away on my own for a while. My main holiday this year was of course interrailing with Ewan which was great fun, but we were in each other’s pockets all the time.
And I realised today that whenever I’ve gone away like this, I’ve always been thinking about how great it is to get away from the madness of #thatlondon or whatever. I’ve been trying to get away from it all, with no real understanding of what it was I was actually trying to get. This weekend for the first time, I’ve been enjoying the positive side – having time with me.
And having spent some time with me, I’ve found that I really like:
listening to the rain;
staring out of steamed up windows, watching condensation dribble down;
walking by myself on the beach;
walking into very strong winds;
watching the sand being blown over the beach;
saying “good morning” to people I don’t know in the street;
saying “good morning” to people ‘cos they’re in the same hotel as you;
having a picnic lunch by myself;
running downhill and not knowing how I’m going to stop myself;
learning about a new bit of kit – today the Canon 5D Mk II;
learning to check the settings on my camera after I’ve given it to someone else to look at;
having a cup of tea in my hotel room;
having someone else make my breakfast;
reading the Sunday Times magazine with my breakfast;
deciding what I want to do next;
yeah, smiling a lot;
singing very loudly on the beach because nobody can hear me;
not caring when I turn round and find that someone *can* hear me;
hiding by the rocks and talking to myself;
being aware of the amazing amount of life that the sea supports;
seeing the sun break through the clouds onto the sea;
finding gulls sitting on my window ledge when I drew the curtains;
suddenly seeing a rainbow appear, right in front of me.
y’know that sort of stuff.
The other thing is that I realise I have all sorts of negative expectations about coming here. When I was a kid, Wales was very definitely another country. Everything was shut on Sunday. The telly was different. All the shops were different, so you couldn’t get the things you got at home. I’ve kind of expected that to still be the same, to feel a bit deprived and thwarted – but of course, there’s wifi in my hotel so I can blog and keep an eye on twitter if I really want to (in between all the other things I’m doing – see above). There’s cable telly in my room but I seem to have grown out of watching telly altogether – I tried last night but I got bored after 10 minutes. And I have had a perfectly good phone signal in most parts of town and have been able to chat with people when I’ve wanted too. Aren’t we funny, the way we hold onto how things usesd to be?