Oh My! I imagine that most of the people who read here will have seen the news last weekend or known anyway, but I got married to Laura Musgrave on 5th September. And I’m chuffed to bits.
I first got married in 1990 just before I turned 26. I thought it was all about us – which means that primarily I thought the day was about me, but then I suppose that at the time I thought my life was all about me anyway.
Life has changed me. Nearly 25 years later, I’ve done it again. I’m privileged to come at it this time with that experience of what marriage is really about and what life is really for. I’m very grateful for the first time round, and in particular, the two beautiful children that came from it – two young people of whom I’m immensely proud today.
Nick Holder was my best man and we went on a walk in the woods a few weeks ago as part of my “stag”. He asked me while we walked, why I was getting married. I said that I liked it, as a state of being. I prefer it, as an idea, to living together without a public declaration and ritual and even all the legal stuff. I like us being a unit – two and one. I like introducing “my wife”.
It’s taken me ten years to come back to this position. When I first moved out in 2005, I was quite sure that I’d spend the rest of my life alone, or in long-term relationships that didn’t involve public commitment and children. But that has changed very very slowly, over the years.
I’ve done a lot of growing up since then and so a couple of years ago, after Laura and I had been together for a year or so, and despite me being on the road at the time, I felt ready to say that, although I didn’t know how it might work out, I would very much like to spend the rest of my life with her and have another family.
A year later I asked her formally, in the Starbucks in the King’s Road which was the place she claimed she first took a shine to me. And now here we are, sitting in San Francisco on the first day of our honeymoon.
Lots was said at the wedding about love and marriage, what it means to us and to all the people who were there. Expect more details in the in-between blogging time I get while I’m away, but my wife has just arrived in the coffee shop!
And thank you, and much love to all those who helped me get here.