#llobo reflections: a self-portrait

I’m creating a little e-book (will probably put it on lulu.com so you can get hard copy too!) of reflections based on my travels since the end of June.  This is the prologue I’ve written  to explain what it’s about, I hope it whets your appetite for the whole thing!

“This is a self-portrait – it is all about me, although I hope you get to learn something of yourself by looking at it.  It’s a series of reflections based on the people that I have met, stayed with, worked with, played with over the last four months on the road.  I left my flat at the end of its lease in June 2011.  I then wandered wherever I was needed or wanted, using my online social network to get word out that I was moving on or in need of something else to do.  I tried to relinquish as much as possible any control over the choice of where to go, but sometimes you just have to choose.

The process I went through to write this piece was to make a list of all the people and then to reflect on what it was that I saw in them of myself.  Then I mixed them all  up to avoid people playing the tempting game of trying to identify which reflection belongs to which person.  It’s sounds like a good game, but would be fruitless even if you could do it.  It would be to mistake the reflection for the reality,  the map for the terrain, the finger that points to the moon for the moon itself.  



If you think you have identified someone from their reflection, have a little think before you start shouting about it.  What does this connection you’ve made say about you?



Why do you want to probe in and analyse and find some hidden truth.  There is no hidden truth, it is all here in plain sight.  This is not about them.  At all.  It’s all about me.  



This particularly applies if you’re one of the people that I’ve spent time with lately.  This really isn’t about you.  It’s about me.  Please forgive me for bringing it up.  Thank you for helping me to see it.  I love you.



I can’t pretend that it’s a comprehensive catalogue of who I am, I have my share of blind-spots.  Perhaps there will be another volume.  That depends on who else I meet and what I see as a result.



All of them are true.  And some contradict others.  That’s life, in my humble opinion.  The contradictions may never be fully resolved, but the attempt to do so is delicious.”

Originally posted on Lloyd’s posterous